Tuesday, August 24, 2010
I find it amazing how you think you know a person. Turns out you sometimes don't. You can spend every minute of your spare time with them, but they can still turn out to be a weirdo.from my past relationships, mutual friends have always been a problem. Whenever a guy and I would break up, he'd still talk to my friends bc they were both mine and his. I thought it was a good thing that my last boyfriend didn't know any of my friends so then his friends could stay his and mine could stay mine.bad thought. Turns out him not knowing anyone was kinda a bad thing bc the only one who knew him was me. there were a lot of signs i did not see. i began noticing them just this past month. we weren't together very long, it turned 2 months on august 18th. i felt held down and controlled. at first i thought it was me, being paranoid or something bc i have those natural instincts, but no. turns out i was right. i found myself drifting from my friends and staying in on the weekends. my social life had fallen and the only other person i had was him. whenever i'd ask him to take me out, it turned into an argument. an argument about why i always have to go out. how am i always going out if i'm staying in all the time? it just made no sense. even when we would go out, an argument would happen bc i wasn't showing him enough attention around my friends or whatever guy friend i hugged was all of a sudden my new "secretive boyfriend" or something. it makes me sick to even think that i wasted so much time explaining myself. i wasn't even doing anything wrong. sure we had some really great times. he treated me good for the most part but im telling you, things started becoming weird. it was almost like an obsession. i don't know how else to describe it. when i first met him, he wasn't the jealous type at all. i could seriously dance at a club with a random dude with him five feet away. the reason i know this is bc i did already. he was fine. but as our relationship progressed, his jealousy came out. it honestly scared me. i decided to take some time for myself now. i realized that whenever he would say he loved me, it just freaked me out. i cared about him but i was never in love with him. i can honestly say that i have been in love 2 times before. the first time to was a boy my freshmen and sophomore year of high school and second was recently to my ex boyfriend. i'm telling you, a person knows whenever another person isn't right. there was definitely something going on up there in his mind. when i broke things off, instead of him handling things maturely, i soon saw the complete opposite.he started telling people how easy i was to get over yet a few minutes before then he had called me crying and begging for another chance. i was like...wow dude. i thought he was very mature for his age. that's one of the things i really liked about him when we first met. but once again, i was wrong. its just really sad that people pretend to be something their not. i had to be honest with myself as well as with him. i told him i was still in love with my ex. he had a fit. at least he knows the truth though right? i felt bad at first but now i know i made the right choice. like i said...it had just turned two months and look how he was getting with me already...becoming jealous and cursing up a storm at me. imagine what it would have been like to break things off with him a year or so later? i'm thankful i saw the signs now rather than later...the only advice i can give someone based off of my experience with this situation is to really get to know the person you are with before you start bringing them around to meet your family and your friends.