Thursday, September 30, 2010

:)

I must say.. This week has been amazing!
I don't think there has been one day where I've been unhappy. Sure, a few nights I would be sad bc I miss him so much but I never left it affect my mood. I was in such an awesome mood all week! It was never changing! Considering I was tired and hardly got enough sleep, you'd think I would be grouchy, but I wasn't! Everytime I heard his voice, it just made me so happy.
Today he got promoted! That's amazing news:) I'm so happy for him. Whatt an accomplishment! I tell ya, he is so amazing. He's brave and strong. Not to mention he's sexy handsome and all mine! I miss and love him very much. You know what else..

I'm gonna have his babies one day:)

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

:(

My heart is broken.
I'm completely lost without you here.the little things people take for granted upset me, especially the fact that they are able to see the person they love everyday and yet here I am waiting:( I miss him so much. It hurts me, makes me cry. I'm in a depressed mood right now. Nothing else to do but lay here and feel sorry for myself. Believe it or not, it helps make me feel better:/

I love you.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

now my time is limited??

It started with me being important. Feeling important and valued. It was almost too good to be true. Lately I've been so lonely;so confused. This isn't the way I want things to be. I'll just wait around and see.why does that have to always happen? Why when u finally get ur way, you forget to appreciate what u have? U forget about all the hard times and depressing times you went through when u were without that person. Once u get them back, right where u want and need them, that eagerness and importance for them goes away. At least that's how I see it:/

Test tomorrow morning then another test later on in the day. Did a little studying but too tired to care right now. Nite.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

no matter how much i try..

I can't find the right words.

I can't even begin to describe how much I miss you.

One week down, I think 13 more to go. Even tho I can't see u until january 8th, which means longer then 13 weeks..I still wanna keep it 13:)

I love you rjp.

never will i ever

Drink another rockstar under any circumstances! no ifs ands or buts about. All I gotta say is yuckkkk!

Friday, September 17, 2010

I love how I can laugh hysterically with him and I'm not embarrassed to let him hear it.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

stressed.

guess its true what people say, stress can cause alot of mess to happen. weird appetites, like never being hungry and then when u are, you devour everything in sight. you randomly feel sick when two minutes before you were feeling fine. it also causes u to become very sleepy:/ yesterday i was reading a book in the library and fell asleep for like a minute. i woke up bc my head lost its support and came crashing down lol it was funny but kinda embarrassing lol. anyway im stressed out about homework. guess i better go do some now.

Monday, September 13, 2010

I wonder if she got hers too?

:/ uhhh.I hate this.
He makes me feel safe, even though he's a world away:/ I miss him terribly, and u better believe I am counting down the days until he is back. I decided to count how many weeks I have until mid december bc I figure that's when he's supposed to be back.looks like 14 weeks counting this one:/ after every weekend I am going to cross it off my calendar:) I can't wait to get to week 2 or even 3! To be that close to seeing him, is going to be the greatest feeling. I know I probably won't be seeing him until sometime in january but that's okay. As long as he's back from over there, I'll be just as happy:) I love him and miss him so much.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Today is 9/11. I'll admit, I am so sad. In tears:(
When I was younger I didn't realize what any of this meant. I was just a little sixth grader getting ready for school one morning. Brushing my teeth,I remember seeing the tv screen filled with flames and smoke.I remember it like it was yesterday. So scary.
Now that I'm older and wiser, I realize a lot more. My 20 year old mind has more knowledge of what's going on around me compared to my little 11 year old mind. I hate this stupid war. I'm so angry with what's going on. I can't speak politics bc honestly I wouldn't know what I'm talking about but all I know is people have lost their lives bc of this.
Not to mention ronnie being a part of it. Risking his life being around those crazy bastards everyday and for what?? This is never going to stop. Just bring him home already. Give him and the other men and women a chance to start their lives. He's so young, hasn't even had a chance to start his life with me. If something ever happened, I swear I would truly hate this world. I thank god for him everyday. He's so brave. I've never met anyone like him before. I'm so thankful he's in my life again. I love him so much. I worry about him everyday. It kills me knowing that the only reason we are apart is because of all of this. Why did he have to leave? Why couldn't he just be here with me.
I love you so much. Thank you for all that u are doing. You are so strong and so brave. I can't wait to marry you ronnie. Please be safe. And once again thank you baby for everything ur risking just to make sure these people, who don't even deserve it most of the time, can have a safe world to live in. When you come back from hell, I'll make sure you have a life as perfect as heaven.
I love you.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

freakyyy!

Life is a trip!
Just two minutes ago I was dead tired. My eyes were droopy and slowly closing. Then all of a sudden my phone started vibrating. It was a text. The text was my horoscope.I signed up for the daily horoscopes so then I can get one sent to my phone everyday. They come at midnight every day but not once has one really touched me.until tonight.
My horoscope for wednesday september 8th says the following: "someone far away is thinking about you--missing you.pick up the phone." Crazy huh!
Wow! I'm so happy right now. I hope its true. I pray its true.
Anyway I'm really tired now:/
Goodnight!

I love you..

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

lame:/

Those stupid army strong commercials still make me sad:(
I read what she said. If she's talking about him, I'm done. she unfortunately was part of my past, but now will not be a part of my future. I promise.

I'm taking a chance with this bc my heart is telling me. I'm hoping it won't do me wrong to follow it.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Wow. Is she still really in the picture?hmm.. Old habits never die. Well, I'm not gonna stand here and wait for ppl to make up their minds. I'm gonna go out and have fun. Maybe meet someone interesting:)

Saturday, September 4, 2010

So I'm kinda upset right now. I had a really interesting dream. It felt so real. When I woke up, I was happy to be dreaming. All I remember was running, and ending no where. I'm curious to know how it ended. Did I die from those gang members chasing me or did I find a good enough hiding place for them to just give up on looking for me? Hmmm... I really hate it how some of my dreams never end and leave me wondering what happened. I wish I could know or at least close my eyes and pick up right where it last left off. Wouldn't that be crazy if everyone could alter the ending to our dream? That would be so very cool..now I lay here in my bed, contemplating whether or not I should call. I went to bed sad last night bc of what was said. If there's other girls, then why can't there be other boys? Just doesn't seem right. Maybe I'm way in over my head with everything. I don't like the immediate insecure feeling I got from our conversation last night. Why would his friend ask if he was talking to chelsea? Really? Maybe I do need some time to really think about this. If someone comes along the way and I find interesting, then why not give it a chance? I can't keep feeling like this with him. It brings back way too many old thoughts and feelings. So many questions unanswered. I don't even think its worth asking. Who knows if the answer will be true or not..looks like I have a lot on my plate right now. Like I said, the only solution would be to give it time. Time will tell, where I'll end up:/

Friday, September 3, 2010

yayyyyy:)

Titanic is on! I love this movie. Its the cutest movie. But its so sad. I cry everytime I see it:( but I love watching it:) makes me miss him even more.I love you.

"Is anybody alive out thereeeee??!" :) favorite part.

hmmm

I'm not gonna lie. I find him very interesting...

Wednesday, September 1, 2010