why respect me...

I mean, to them I was only just the girlfriend right? That's BS. I was alot more then that and it would be nice if I was treated with a little more respect. I was supposed to be with him forever. I think alot fail to realize that. But its okay. There will come a day when ppl will finally see that I held his heart and he held mine. There's a reason for why we wanted to get married. I'm still praying that one day they can accept that. Until then, just knowing that he's watching is the only comfort I need:)

Have you ever just wanted to run away? Run to a place where u don't know anyone and everything is so unfamiliar to you?have you ever wished that u could escape your problems? I know there's a place like this.. its called heaven. I can't wait to get there. There will be no more pain or suffering. Our memory will be wiped clean and all we will feel is peace and love even towards our worst enemy. That's where he is and it brings me peace during moments like this. I just really wish he were here instead. I just wanna go away, far far away. I can't believe that I'm actually having thoughts about joining the military. I think if he were here, he would be very upset. But I truly want to look into it. I want to make a difference in this world. I want to fight for my family and my friends. I want to bring peace into their lives and I want to make them proud. I want to make ronnie proud of me. I know there's going to be a lot of people upset with me but I think I'm gonna do it.